Moira and Baby Dube #2: Where does the time go?

It's been awhile since I've updated and I apologize to those who follow along. And brace yourself because this is a long one!

I usually don't blog about my moms illness on here. But the past month and recent happenings deserve a post to itself. Unfortunately, mom passed away on Oct 12th. She had been in the hospital for 3 weeks from what started as another back break and then was home a week before passing away surrounded by us girls in the comforts of home at Denise's condo. Although she had battled pancreatic cancer for nearly 3 years and we felt very fortunate for her to be one of the few who beat the odds and lives that long, the end came rather quickly and unexpectedly. We had no idea getting discharged from the hospital that day, she would be gone a week later. Don't get me wrong, we were told her time here was limited... we just didn't realize that limited.

Right before Labor day, mom came and stayed 5 nights with us because she so badly wanted to help "like a mother should".. Tradition! It was difficult... she was not feeling well, eating was a challenge and her nausea and vomiting were peaking near its worst. But she was able to hold her, fold a load of her laundry while enjoying looking at all the tiny clothing and just look at her. She also informed me when she had, what she would call... a "poop-a-loop" Ohhhh, the things babies make you say! Anyways, although trying at times and emotionally difficult because I wanted to be able to take care of my mom like I always had but now had a 3 week old and myself to care for, I am so glad she was able to even have short periods of feeling good and holding her. After dropping her off at Dee's on Sunday before Labor day, she was admitted to the hospital later that week.

Moira and I for 3 weeks, packed up each morning and drove into Boston to spend several hours with her. We did this just about 4 days a week if not more, for 3 weeks. Although at 1 month old, and 1 month post-partum this was difficult (ok, extremely difficult) at times... lack of sleep, feeding schedules, packing up a breastpump... we did it and I could not be more happy that we did. Mom got to hold her and see her each day. Little did we know just how very valuable this time was! But I think thats what pushed us through, to get there. Besides the fact that my mom needed our presence at the hospital more then ever due to how sick she was, it was also nice to bring her some happiness with Moira. She was so proud with pictures hanging in the room of her grand daughter that when we would arrive, all the nurses on the unit knew about her! "Ohhhhh! Is this the baby???" Moira throughout this all, could not have been a better baby! She was so go with flow. The nurses would always say how they never heard a peep from her. We were truly blessed with how wonderful and adaptable she is!

Moira continued to be a trooper when mom came home to Dee's. After 2 days we realized things were moving faster then we realized and so began, what we called... "the great sit-in". From Thursday to the following Weds, my sisters and I and our significant others as well as my moms brothers and families rotated through the "great sit-in" which included rotating into the room with my mom, lots of food thanks to friends and family, laughter and tears and a fair amount of wine and beer! The girls and I took turns at night and with a baby, this was no easy fete. Thankfully, Mike took over night duties so I could help with night duty for my mom. It was a labor of love and well worth every exhausting, sleep deprived, emotional minute to make it as comfortable for my mom as possible. I don't think any of us can look back and say we didn't give it 150%. And Moira, again, through it all was amazing! She just went with the flow! The Ficus tree in Dee's apartment with Christmas lights really kept her occupied- she loves staring at that thing!

Fast forward past several days down in CT for the services... more of Moira being amazing through it all... and we're back home now for a little over a week. I will say since being home, Moira is sleeping much better and is getting more a schedule rather then just trying to read her cues like we had been. But she is one amazing little baby and I am so thankful she was so awesome through it all to allow me to be there for my mom too. And also to help me push through it and get her there to see my mom as much as we did. We have some pretty great photos to show for it. And up until the very end of my mom being able to communicate with us... she was holding Moira as best she could, kissing her face and calling her "such a little sweetie pie"......

Mom visiting the week before Labor Day....